What if... and Karma

What if? .... what if we do have a soul and this soul is linked to a greater vision. What if?... what if this our body is, well, just a body... that we chose to enter. What if?... what if we chose to be a part of this body's experiences to learn our greatest lesson yet? What if?... what if this included a contract with those that surround us. A very intimate contract. What if? What if... this was our Karma.

These 'what if's' are much of what I believe. There is more than just 'this.' 

Our Souls are forever. Our Soul are committed. to Our Forever Journey. to One Another. to the Highest & Greatest Good. to Love.

What if... what if we were able to get a glimpse of what our life was to look like before we ventured into our body? What if... we were able to get a glimpse of several Ego state bodies, of which we are able to choose to enter into one? What if we chose the one that would most align us with our deepest & highest Souls Journey. 

Could we/Would we then perhaps see our Life through different eyes. Could we/Would we see our current circumstances through a different awareness. Could we/would we then be able to see through the illusions. 

What if?... what if we looked into the heart of each person that we came into contact with. What if?"... what if we looked past the visual and know that they too have a souls journey, that they too are committed to? What if?... would we be more willing to reach out and help, rather than push away, down, and condemn. 

Our Bodies come with Ego, not our Souls. A part of this journey is to align the Ego with the Souls Journey. To align the Ego with Love. Perhaps the 'fight' within is about, why did I choose this hell? Why would anybody? Why do good things happen to them? Some even ask, why can I not take away their pain?

The answer is always... Because we each have a Greater Lesson. Perhaps your lesson is so amazing and will take your Soul to a whole knew level of understanding, compassion, perhaps humour & awareness. 

Just for today, close your eyes and stand high up on a mountaintop, Mount Kilimanjaro perhaps. Look out into the vastness of the world, the sky; see the trees, perhaps the animals and others that surround you. Then feel the energy within you. Then feel your energy as it surrounds outward. Expand this energy outward as far as it can go, to the outer reaches of the ends of the earth and to the stars in the sky. Feel the connection of all that your energy touches. Sense the change in energy as it touches different things. How does it feel different? How does it enhance your being? How does your energy effect that which you touch? What do the two energies feel as they connect, as they touch? Can you change this energy? Transform it in any way? What is your reason for transforming it?    

I awoke with so many questions this morning; with a new awareness. With a hope and with a courage. Mostly to stand tall in my beliefs, my values, as my journey, is exactly that, my journey. One that is connected to the people that I chose and agreed to share this time on earth, in this body, with this ego mind, with love. 

Seneca on Fears

“You act like mortals in all that you fear, and like immortals in all that you desire” ~ Seneca

There are times when my thoughts turn to negativity or fear. That often surprises people, though, I am not sure why exactly. I do try and work through it as quickly as I can, using my Intuition and connecting with my Higher Self through meditation.  I have learned to embrace the emotions as they come forth, bless them, and finally send them on their way to be healed. Even then, still there are times that persist. The Human Ego.

There are times when the feelings and emotions just want to hang around, like an annoying ex-lover who just doesn't seem to want to let go OR to be healed. The more you try, the more restless you become. So I stop completely and find a distraction.  Last night was one such night. After tossing and turning, I gave into the restlessness and turned on my Tablet. I have said it before and I'll say it again, synchronicity is a delightful spice of life.

Through a string of coincidences, during a Facebook conversation with a gentleman in regards to something entirely different, I was directly led to the teachings of Seneca on Fear. I can't say whether or not I have heard them before, because it really doesn't matter, all I know is that upon reading the first line, I was both mezmorized and enchanted.  Odd.

Let's see where it takes us❤

'The mind at times fashions for itself false shapes of evil when there are no signs that point to any evil; it twists into the worst construction some word of doubtful meaning; or it fancies some personal grudge to be more serious than it really is, considering not how angry the enemy is, but to what lengths he may go if he is angry. But life is not worth living, and there is no limit to our sorrows, if we indulge our fears to the greatest possible extent.'

-From Seneca's essay on Groundless Fears

I am not sure if I agree with, ... but life is not worth living. But then again, it may describe someone battling depression, with thoughts of suicide. So as I pondered to completely understand its meaning, to me, I went through various writings. And it began to make sense to me. I decided to share, just in case there is someone out there in need of a little nudge. 

I do not know the order of letters or paragraphs, all I know is that it opened the fear to allow me to kick that fear right out on its backside! Here is what I read...

'It makes perfect sense, but what we do not do is seek out the situations that we fear, so that we can face them head on. If you were afraid of something, why not throw yourself at it and see what it truly is. What were you truly afraid of? Is it even worth that fear? Doing so will only ease your fear when the stakes may be much higher and provide you a strength that can’t be found in any other way.'

Most fear is irrational, based on past experiences, advice from a friend, a movie we saw, an article that we read, or even a teaching. I do believe that we know this deep down, but that certainly does not stop us! ... the writings continued...

'I don’t know why or how we do it, but when we’re afraid of something, we have a knack for coming up with the worse possible outcome we can imagine. We can get impressively creative when it comes to imagining scenarios that we think will happen to us. We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.  Accordingly,  

Some things torment us more than they ought; some torment us before they ought;  and some torment us when they ought not to torment us at all!. 

We are in the habit of exaggerating, or imagining, or anticipating, sorrow.'

This is learned. 

'Often times, it is not even you who are afraid or have any issues with what’s ahead, but others that plant these ideas in your mind. When people don’t understand what you’re trying to do, when they are envious or jealous or pessimistic, they will fill your head with negativity and fears. You have to be aware of this and not let it hold you back.

We agree too quickly with what people say. We do not put to the test those things which cause our fear; we do not examine into them; we blench and retreat just like soldiers who are forced to abandon their camp because of a dust-cloud raised by stampeding cattle, or are thrown into a panic by the spreading of some unauthenticated rumour. And somehow or other it is the idle report that disturbs us most. 

Accordingly, weigh carefully your hopes as well as your fears, and whenever all the elements are in doubt, decide in your own favour; believe what you prefer.  And if fear wins a majority of the votes, incline in the other direction anyhow, and cease to harass your soul, reflecting continually that most mortals, even when no troubles are actually at hand or are certainly to be expected in the future, become excited and disquieted. No one calls a halt on himself, when he begins to be urged ahead; nor does he regulate his alarm according to the truth.

What does it avail to run out to meet your suffering? You will suffer soon enough, when it arrives; so look forward meanwhile to better things. What shall you gain by doing this? Time…The mind at times fashions for itself false shapes of evil when there are no signs that point to any evil; it twists into the worst construction some word of doubtful meaning… But life is not worth living, and there is no limit to our sorrows, if we indulge our fears to the greatest possible extent... in the end, the most important point is to remember that fear is doing one thing, preventing us from living the life we desire.

If only each of us had our own good friends who could write thoughtful insights to us now and then!  So if you are suffering from such groundless fears, then take heart in what he’s saying and notice that things aren’t as scary as you may be making them out to be.  Pay attention, explore your fears, and understand what they really are. If you do so, you’ll notice that you can overcome them. And with that, I turned the light and fell silently asleep.

The fool, with all his innocence and faults, he brings his gift... he is always preparing to live.

the Mind of Compassion

The mind of compassion knows no bitterness nor judgment. 

No good nor bad, no right nor wrong, no true nor false. 

Only the wish for all beings to be happy. ~ Guanyin

Unplugged. Raw. And Alive.  The spotlight shines upon our Journey. Brightly, surrounded by her peers, and there are many, many peers that applaud the distance that you have traveled. Bravo. And so she continues to seek and to discover. But mostly... to experience. Life & Love

"While I was in it, experiencing it, I felt like a tempest had beset me. Uncomfortable events and perceptions. My determination and willingness to observe (variable at best) is what carried me to a place that is a space in the spirit where I can grasp some small revelation of my Self. 

...About this compassion thing -- 

it's turning out to be something very different from what I have understood it to be. It's not only a feeling of empathy, or wanting to alleviate the suffering of another, and the other meanings that are rather standard definitions. Compassion for all beings? 

It's sometimes difficult to have an active compassion, even for those I 'perceive' as deserving of compassion. What of those I think don't deserve it? What of those who are violent, heinous criminals, murderers, child molesters, and rapists? The less horrifying end of the scale -- the ones to whom I react with indignation, distaste, jealousy, etc. Some examples - how dare you treat me like that? how dare you talk to me like that? Who do you think you are, being, doing, acting like that? <<<<<< All reactive thoughts to anything that threatens my precious image of myself at the moment.

>>>>> I'm a good person. I don't deserve this or that. I'm kind to others so why am I being treated like this or that? I reached out, so why didn't they reach back? .....on and on. 

I discovered so many levels of it so far that my head is spinning! It is beyond insidious and pervasive. I think there are many sides to this 'thing' called compassion.  

And I think it really must begin with having compassion for myself. 

For me, this means initially practicing being with, and allowing without reacting to, the unwanted feelings that arise within me in correspondence to events. I believe the beginning of compassion is toleration of the part of the mind that throws out random definitions of events; pre-conditioned thoughts, to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. 

If I get into the story the mind wants to create, I suffer, and suffer unnecessarily for what seems like an eternity, and others suffer as well. 

The necessary suffering of myself, or compassion for myself, is that I see and watch the mind give its negative suggestions, without engaging, without picking them up. THEN, I can realize this immediate negative response to an event is indeed pre-conditioned. And, if I do engage, I can see that my options and possible outcomes are severely limited.  

The mind can, does, and will try very hard to take away my innate free will. 

In realizing the essential need to have compassion for myself first, and cultivating it as best I can, I then can realize that compassion for others is perhaps tolerating and allowing my own self-image-protection 'thoughts', or negative, fear-mongering 'thoughts' to rise and fall, so that I can begin to live from a place of all humanity's natural potential for goodness -- Spirit or Self with a capital S, instead of only self-mind. An admittedly daunting journey at times! I'm just starting to get my 'footing' in this place called groundlessness ---

the place, for me, that is Spirit. 

Karma

'I've had an unwanted visitor recently,'  "Her name is Ms. Guilt. She usually comes a knockin' and as soon as I see her through the peep hole, I engage the trap door on the porch. Ha! So long, bitch! Somehow I left my front door open and she came right in. 


Karma was the story of my day. and to me, it seems fitting with the drama that is playing itself out so brilliantly in the minds of many. 

We throw this word 'Karma' around like a loose piece of thread. 'Karma's a bitch.' 'Karma will bite him in the ass,' on and on and on. So when I read this statement, it created quite a stir within.  Most of our messages and reflections of Karma, are really just day to day occurrences and lessons. 

True, this is only my opinion, but one that I am passionate about and upon reading this message, I reflected upon, with hopes of opening a door of forgiveness. Karma is very different than the daily law of cause and effect, and it takes an enormous courage to, first, bear the pain, to learn, to grow, to let go. 

This is Spirituality to me; the Journey, the lessons and the growth. Karma is the Soul's Journey.   We don't all know our Karmic lessons, not in our every day consciousness, and they are typically much more monumental than the pettiness that is often tossed around. My understanding of Karma, is about a relationship with another, or others, from past lives, that we have challenged ourselves to see what we may have forced upon another, in another lifetime. For Spiritual Growth & Awareness.
  
I believe that we have, in this lifetime, in the here and now, all that we need to accomplish what it is that we set out to accomplish. I also believe that forgiveness, love, & compassion is at the top of the list and opens the door to so much more. 

Forgive yourself.  Don't condemn yourself to a life of misery or unjust rewards for mistakes or missed judgments. See the lesson. See the gifts that are begin offered and heal. Heal the pain, heal the sorrow; pack up the guilt and blame into a suitcase and send her on her way. Forever. And step into greatness.  It's YOURS.

BLISS!!!!!

The Bossy Counselor

Writer's Block. I have it. The more I try, the more frustrated I become. So I let it go. My writing has always reflected a thought process into what is manifesting in my brain at any present time, and usually in every moment. Right now there is nothing. 

It all began with me having a voice. My own voice. When our voice has been stuffed deep inside of us for a long time, the journey back to finding it, hearing what it sounds like, differentiating it from the other voices in our head, inching it out one word, then thought, at a time, until we are finally comfortable and (yikes!) confident in voicing it.

And for awhile, there can be a fear that this voice just might be stuffed back inside that box!  Because inside that box were often ten, twenty more, voices that want to be recognized and heard.  

I think that's where I am right now. It feels like others are trying hard to rebuild that box that I worked so diligently at tearing down, so that they can jump inside.

I do always try to give consideration & thought to opinions, truths, judgements, experiences, perspectives, and stories, but for me, importantly, my journey is about me; with an awareness of where I am, where I've been, how I got here and where I am going. To then makes choices that reflect my path, lessons, and experiences. Perhaps with a little help from their voice. Perhaps not. That's just my story.  I do know, also, that sometimes I am very slow learner. That's okay. I am in no hurry. 

Which brought me back to what I 'do,' my gift and with it, another side to the story.

For me, it was something that was learned. That we are taught adamantly in counseling. I do understand the concept of it and in fact, I follow most of the other guidelines; but for some reason I can't follow this one... 

Yes... that is me right there, snap dab in the middle... the reason the rules are made. I guess that's why I am always trying to bust them down¡

Some might find it contradictory, I suppose. I do believe that there is a difference between seeking friendly advice and requesting messages and direction from Spirit and the cards.

And so♡ ... this is where the bossy comes in. My bossy.  I am very aware that this is where my problem stems from in regards to counseling. I have to consciously separate the two. The Messages and Advice. 

It's just not that easy. But I am learning, discovering more and more each day. 

So the reason that I am deep in silence, is that I want to hear what my own thoughts feel and sound like again. I want to recognize that they are coming from that pure place and not the past fear, doubt, or judgment that I had come to know. This is only possibly when we become really quiet & silent within❤

That's where I am. Today. 

Expect♡

It's been both a slow, and yet busy week. Conversations were short. I, personally have had a week filled with self contemplation.  Always a lesson that shows and to be seen. Life is like that.

Expectation.

'Simple logic shows that “Love” is always firstly dependent on “Hope” as "choice" because although you may choose to “Love” there is no valid guarantee that love will be returned.'

This, too, implies expectation.  How do my lessons reflect this? A daily challenge of the heart & soul♡

Love does not always depend on hope. Give love unconditionally, not to have it returned, but because it is unlimited. Give it wherever you are, give it anyways and in all ways. Give from the heart and without condition or expectation. Another's ability to receive love does not depend on my ability to give love.

Huh... lives and messages parallel♡

Many blessing of love this week that flow into the New Year♡ 

Authentic

And so begins my day♡ truth be told♡ this was a tough week, highs and lows, ups and downs, that began with a most impromptu meeting with a dear friend, followed by an inspirational meditation. The calm and the peace to set the pace.

The next couple of days were as life was supposed to be. You see, a little over 3 months ago, during a meditation class, I received a message from an uncle who had passed a couple years back. The message was 3 months. I understood the message, however the recipient was unexpected. The lesson was one of awareness.

Three months later, yesterday, almost to the day, my aunt's spirit (his wife) left her body to return to the spirit world. When I first received the message, I understood it to be a confirmation that the messages were real.  We had no idea at that time that she was sick. We found out a couple of weeks back. That is when the message began to make sense. What I understand it to mean, now, is a confirmation that the spirit world is real. The messages are a gift and to be embraced. 'This all is the way it is supposed to be.'  And to further celebrate the moving out of ones body and the journey back to the world of pure love, compassion, and joy; sending their spirit off with blessings and love, gratitude and well-wishes, to embark on the next phase of their journey.

And here on earth, to celebrate the gifts that were learned and left behind through our relationship with that person. To celebrate human life.  This is the way it is supposed to Be.  Not with sadness, but joy & love. Life is real. And so is the spirit world. We come here, to earth, for a reason, a commitment, a journey to embark upon, to learn and experience. It's about relationships, not just between you and me, but much broader, and much more committed than most understand.   

That's about where I am there and right on que and what I have learned, what I now know, is that there is a gift to be embraced and a lesson to be learned, and shared. The illusion of separation. We are one.

Raw. Rare. Honest. Brilliant. And so a new journey begins. The illusion becomes clearer. Most days.






 

The Lighthouse

To know your soul better, you must leave your ego behind, enter places you never thought possible, and question all that you know; believing, with every step forward, and in each moment of every breath, that there is light shining within you; a light that once lit, will have the ability to create all things possible, and love deeper than ever imagined. A light that will shine brightly forevermore.

And the Lighthouse will guide you. Amid the rain, the winds, and the storms, the Lighthouse stands tall; a Beacon of light, gentle in its offerings, unwavering in its efforts. It knows that it is the light, and that its light will continue to shine. That you will find your way. Its light shines brightly from within. 

And so began a week of lessons; of discovery, of highs and lows. Of light. We are all born of love♡ We are all born of a path in which we most wish to experience greatness of self. Sub-Conscious to Conscious Thought♡ Within Us is the Purest Expression of Self.   True Self needs no approval

Any time we seek approval, we are not living from True Self. However, one thing I'm sure of is that our lower nature will always keep throwing out 'suggestions' that we do need approval. That ruffled up, fearful, shrinking-violet voice will always speak to us. We must be aware constantly that this voice is NOT our True Voice. This lower nature will try every way to drag us down into believing we cannot, should not, will not, and do not. And only IF someone approves, can we be sure we are 'ok.'

In recognizing, little by little, how insidious this lower nature is within us, we also can begin to realize it is ALL imagination. And it is not to be feared... after all, these suggestions it makes are only thoughts. And we do not have to take the bait. We do, more often than we know, take the bait. Even as I am writing this, that lower nature is saying to me, "Be careful what you put out there. People don't want to see this." And I respond, "No, I'm sure they don't.

But I will put it out there anyway. Because we need to see Truth." I know what approval seeking does to one's life. It sucks it dry. It conjures up the most hideous aspects of imagined fearfulness. Getting out of that pit is not a one-shot deal. It's a daily work. But, as I like to say,  

"There's a rope. Grab it, and climb." We are able to be strong, because we ARE strength.

Anything that tells us we are weak, is lower nature speaking. Choose this day, this hour, this moment, every day, every hour, every moment, whom you will serve.' 

This took us on an entirely separate and reflective conversation. It's purpose, at the time, unaware, but served our awareness at the root of our conversation.
 
'I remember a lot about how we first connected,' she began, 'it was through the Reiki page I had. Somehow, Facebook decided to remove your page from my page's 'likes'. You noticed this and sent me a personal message. You were so gracious, and you knew we were going to connect further in some way in the future. I remember very clearly thinking "This lady is going to be part of my life". And so it is.'

'Below is part of the message you sent to me regarding the 'unlike' event.... Oh, and apparently I did indeed unlike the page myself... I was throwing a tantrum...'

Dear ...'It seems that I have been led to communicate with you, so, I do so. To be honest, when messages come, I have not found the way, yet, to let the message go until I have communicated it. I guess that's the point! and there is no way to argue with Spirit!  So please, take care, know that you have an amazing gift, one that is most necessary to the rest of the world as it is to yourself. You are loved and supported by the Universe.'  and with this, a friendship so began. One that is open, inspiring, and allowing.

Over the past couple of days we have talked much about 'Doing from the heart' and how it fits in with Truth.' We talked on further until, finally, a cord of awareness was struck. Truth. 

'What I am taking from your wisdom on doing from the heart is this.' she reflected, 'I will not be the lighthouse running around shining the Light in eyes that are closed. I will instead be the Lighthouse, sturdy and grounded, for the Light, And eyes that want to see will see. I need do nothing.' 

There, there it is....

... and so the light indeed does shine brightly from within you. You are the Light, reflective of the Lighthouse. You are the Love. 

And There is the Peace that I Am.

'Will I be my Self?'

Which led me to ponder and ask a question, first to myself, then to everyone this week prior to meditation. Our HIGHER Self. When we talk about are Higher Self, what does this mean to you? 

I wondered because, we are so often these days, told to ask 'our higher self' or do 'for the greatest good of self,' and if we don't know 'who' or 'what' this is, then how can we ever listen to it? 

We are taught values and beliefs and then accept them without even really understanding what they mean. It's time to really, truly, step outside of this box; push down the barriers and question what you think you 'know.' Why? Because we have played 'follow the blind leader' for far too long. It's time to colour outside the lines, because really, there are no lines. 

 “The past has no power to stop you from being present now. Only your grievance about the past can do that. What is grievance? The baggage of old thought and emotion.” ~ Lao Tzu

"I am learning that I AM my Self. Being anything other than my true Identity is a disturbance, and therefore not Me. Oh sure, I can go ahead and fall back to sleep, and often do, getting caught up in the illusions of past or future. But I recognize this more and more often now. And I come awake, as best I can, as best I know how to right now. And there is the Peace that I AM. 

Practicing being awake, aware, present, however you wish to call it, reveals who we truly are. And in those revelations we find that we are home already, loved already, whole already. Whatever we were seeking is truly seeking us. We only need to observe that we are not our mind, and in that observation comes the unveiling of the mystery. Reconciliation, completion. Home. Safe. Loved, wanted, needed, adored, enough, holy, creators, lovers, light and dark, all that is and was and will be. Suspended briefly in this path called time, which flows through us."

And with that, my answer is simple. The results more powerful. Your Higher Self. That's YOU.   YOU minus the fear, the doubt, the worry, and the blame. YOU outside of the consciousness, the reactive, the teachings, the safety. YOU. Just YOU, pure and loving.

Just like that....

If I think back, I don't even remember how we met.  I do know that it really makes no difference at all. What I am aware of is that right from the very beginning there was a connection, a very deep one. One that carries the vibration of love, gentleness, respect, and compassion. 

My week began like every other week. It quickly became Wednesday, when suddenly, and such as life gives us, all changed. When life's major events brings change, we jump aboard a bus and see the world through different eyes. Always a reminder of how precious life is and that we come here to fulfill a contract, with ourselves, our soul's most deepest desires. 


*****
A reminder that we are beautiful. This is so often the journey of many, the struggles, and the sense. What I have learned, what I have experienced, is that compassion, kindness, respect, and honesty, must come together with the the Loving Allowance. of all to be. in their own place and time. That's IT.

There are no exceptions. We cannot walk another's path. As much as we see them hurting, flayalling, crying, and/ or acting out, all that we can do is show with love. We can offer guidance or experience, but it is completely up to them to take their lead. When they decide its the right time.

To do this without enabling and being true to ourself, is conscious awareness; thought, action, and deed. You can choose to walk away. Choose to do so to be true to who you are. Choose to be there for them when they have reached the moment of self awareness for themselves. 

People around us can be frustrating. If you choose them to be. What I have learned is that if you can't change it, let it go. Really. Breathe in. Deeply. Accept that there was a gift or a lesson. And Bless them with all the love that you have (cause love is endless!). and Just let it go. It is that simple. Walk forward whole.

It's only made more complicated because we allow it to be. ....in their own place and time.. it's their journey. Journal your feelings, if you have to, to understand yourself better, process in all ways you can - vent the anger, frustration or whatever you need to do to keep moving forward. And be open to new relationships and friendships. Sometimes these periods are trans-formative in amazingly good ways that we can't always see in the moment as it happens. 

It hurts until we realize that it is not up to us. And that it is not a fault within us. A fault of who we are, the true You. They may be lashing out because they see that you are being who you are and they still a caged bird, perhaps they didn't even know it. They see and suddenly know that they, too, want to be who they truly are. They will get there, but not by you changing. But by you loving. and perhaps letting go. for now.

What I have learned, is that there is so much that I do not know, but there is so much more that I do know. And there is always room to know more, learn more, discover, take a chance on, and to love... always much more love to be had. Focus on what you can do, where you can make a difference, and always, from that place deep within your heart.

The only person whom others can truly Love is the true you. Goes for them too.