Cleaning House; Reflection and Truth

"The Secret to change is to focus all your energy, not on fighting the old... but on BUILDING the new."

This was today's Avent Calendar message from my amazing friend, Tess Peterson, whom, I was to be the teaching, but as all turns towards truth, we are all teachers and we are all students in this amazing and challenging world called life. I am sure that she did not consciously realize how much these messages would impact me, my space; my life.  I DO know that she knows this intutively. She is Brillant, Beautiful, and Wise, far beyond the expectations that we recognized when we first met for a reading. But then again, she would say that I did know it. It was such a natural progression and the kind of friendship that lasts throughout our lifetimes, on a soul level. 

My answer to this would be ME. The parts of me that have been lost, beginning as a young child. 

True to my word and teachings, we all experience situations and challenges in accordance to our Soul's agenda and the more we push against these lessons, the further we move away from our truth. 

Esssentially, what I lost was the truth of who I am deep within.

This always takes me back to the poem said to have been penned by Chalie Chaplin, "As I began to love myself."

Today, I chose cards to reflect what I had experienced in my session this week with my psychologist. Truth be told, my Spirit Guide is amazing and will always send to me what I need, definitley not what I always WANT to hear.  The messages are meant to challenge and induce change; the tranformation of energy. Hitting Rock Bottom was merely the first step in the process, followed with Cleaning House, and finally coming out, alive and well, from the Deep Freeze. 

The two cards from a deck that I received from my niece, Brittany, brought the messages of Reflection and Truth. All together, it sums up the work ahead of me today. I always put in the work, no matter how painful, because on the other side of the challenges and hard work IS my truth and happiness. Me, and all of the love that I know exists and is there, waiting, in limbo, for me to open up to and remember. 

REFLECTION: You attract what you reflect and what is necessary for your growth, as both a human, and on a soul level. I can see how I have been attracting what was necessary to anger and frustrate me into action. For me, Spirit knows that it will do the trick!  As I spend time in reflection, I begin to understand more and more that if I am unhappy with those around me; if I don't like my present situation... then I am accountable to point the finger, not at anyone else, but rather at myself.  That finger is so filled with accusations and anger, I can see clearly now that it is an accusitory finger and serves no perpose. The person that I need to see clearly, is inside my own self image. 

TRUTH: Honesty... what I have learned to understand were the five steps to truth.

1. Be completely honest with myself about myself.

2. Be completely honest with others about myself.

3. Be completely honest with myself about others.

4. Be completely honest with others about them. (we do teach people how to treat us and in doing so, we often wear a facade or mask).

5. and finally, Be completely honest 100% of the time. All the while being true to me.  For me, this comes in the form of kindness, compassion, love, and wholeness. 

Deceipt only amplifies confusion, not just within, but manifests chaoes all around us. I have said it time and time again, and believe it to my core, you cannot have an legitimate conversation with a deceitful person. We are only fooling ourselves into believing that it is truth. This requires an understanding of the need in which it serves.  

Deceit causes stress, illness, and unhappiness. It tears us up from within. Be honest. Be true. Uncomplicate your life by telling the truth. This is my next step forward.  I do not like complicated, yet life has become complicated and that resulted in me hitting a new low. Fortunately, I have worked through so many processes, that I was able to recover more quickly, as I don't hang onto much, which allows me to find and see the light. 

My session with my therapist this week took me to a place of discomfort; one in which translated to anger, self judgement, compromise, and dissonance. I hit a wall. As I look at the picture on the card, I see the the road to the bottom, has to hit the bottom to find the road to the top again. In my case, I cannot just leap over the road to the upside.

Rock Bottom:

As difficult as it may have been to disclose the circumstances, I had reached that point where I could go no further in the same manner in which I'd been going up to present; with eyes wide shut.  I realized after yesterday that I was experiencing a deep sense of loss and didn't know where to turn. It came forth as anger and betryal. But then I did know where to turn. Inward. 

I understand that the old way of doing things must be fully acknowledged as an experience and that it was the experiences that I am angry about. Again, if we are angry as a person, this puts the power on them to heal, when it is soley up to me. I also understand that it is time to forgive and fully discard, in order to move onward and upward. A new direction and a new strategy were definitley calling out my name... loudly. 

The truth is that the only way out is through surrender. To accept things as they are and were, from where they came from, to hit the truth at the bottom, and to challenge what I knew and thought of me in order to begin the climb back upwards. This is where Spirit is so generous and forgiving. I can wait for that heartfelt moment of release or I can choose to seek a higher understanding. That is when a stairway will appear, like magic, and all manner of synchronicities will show the way to higher ground.  Rock Bottom implies a sign that a miracle is about to occur, but only if I let go completely.  I am prepared to fully surrender. 

Cleaning House:

This certainly does seem like the natural progression of release and healing. The time is before me to de-clutter. For me, at this point, is really about cleaning my inner house, my sub-conscious and conscious mind; to get rid of what does not serve me, of unwanted memories that I cling to without even being aware, and to finally, once and for all, release what I no longer want or need along my journey.

Thoughts, memories, and emotional baggage must be swept out of my mind; my conscience must be clear for me to move freely in the world.  I am choosing to move forward to feel the freedom as I make way for much better things. Forgiveness of self and others can be done within and this is where I must begin with this process. 

The final card is that of Deep Freeze.  This is an ending of a cycle, as I further understand the why's of my present circumstances and experiences; of reclaiming my power and the truth of who I am and always have been.  This beacons me to slow down, to take time for me today. To understand and to realize that this IS about me and my souls jouney. It also recongnizes that Spirit has my back. Synchronicities.  That's how it begins. I trust fully in Spirit to bring me what I need, to fufil my needs, to bring me to my hopes, dreams and visions. Hope; I have found mine again. Visions for the future; I have, along with a good friend, Sig, found a new vision in which we are in the process of co-creating and manifesting. But manifestation does not come with blockages... it only comes when we are open to receive. It's now time for me to receive what I truly desire. I just had to remember who I was. 

So a few things will be put on hold as I continue down this path today. I will be there for me. I will regenerate and forgo ambitious activity, as I need my energy to move into healing. I have put my ideas, thoughts and visions to the Universe. I am required to trust and not push. I am required to allow my ideas to expand outward; to shift and to change... I don't have to be anywhere, but only to experience this present moment.  

Self-Care is my motivation for today; to step back and reflect; rest and dream. Creation happens most when we let go. 

In love, light, awarness, and forgiveness... I've got Golden Bones <3 LoriLynn BOOMBA <3