There is Always Something about today...

Over the past 10 months, I have been engaged in a challenging relationship with Trust.

This perhaps may be the craziest of all thoughts lately. I am truly, from within, trying to understand. With a bit of hope, perhaps I can sort through the insanity of my thoughts to find some substance with which to draw strength from.

Although there have been times throughout my life where I have thought that things were just not working out for me, I have always, always had a sense that they eventually would, that something wonderful was waiting around the corner. Then I got to thinking, what if that corner never comes? Which always leads me back to the question, "What does it all mean?" What if everything that I believe in just isn't? What if? What if something that you have believed in forever just isn't? Where do I go from there? 

I believe that our universe in a constant state of wondering, of searching, of discovering, of learning. We all have core beliefs. Many, if not most of these core beliefs were taught to us by our families. At the core of my  beliefs is God.

To understand my own question and as always, our thoughts must come from outside the box. There are so very many theories and idealisms, but really, they are just that. Somehow and outside that box, I believe that it's really all much simpler than we make it out to be. 

As it is the Christmas season, my thoughts have been directed towards the birth of the baby Jesus.  I a not sure why I am so thinking about this, I just am and I accept it. So with that...

It is said that God sent Jesus because he so loved us. Ok, I like that. John 3:16-17: “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life."  I believe in everlasting life, so I'll go with that. “For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.”   

So each year, we set out to celebrate the birth of the baby Jesus. To remember the reasons, to see the light. The problem is that we only see this as a one day event. After the presents are opened, we then pack it all away for yet another year. Quite to often, as well, we have truly forgotten the reason for the celebration. It's to celebrate our true spirit. To celebrate forgiveness. To love one another. Growing up, I remember thinking that I had to be good otherwise Santa would not bring presents. That was good enough to keep me in check much of the time. It seems now that it doesn't matter anymore. It's just about the present and the bigger and more expensive the better. So what does that teach, not only our children, but ourselves. We are driving further and further away from the truth, from the light. 

Righteousness is a theological concept in Christianity. It is an attribute that implies that a person's actions are justified, and can have the connotation that the person has been "judged" or "reckoned" as leading a life that is pleasing to God.

John 10:10:  “I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” This means a changed life from sin to righteousness, the fruit of the Spirit instead of the works of the flesh. These are “love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Gal 5:22-23) Ephesians 5:9: (goodness, righteousness, and truth).  

Therein may lie the lesson, the clarification. We are all on our own journey, our own spiritual awakening. A life pleasing to God is one within the Commandments. That is why it is just about us, to judge only ourselves, our actions. 

During crisis, many ask "how God could let this happen?" in one context or another. I believe that the truth is that God is not 'letting' this happen. We, the people are letting it happen. We see more and more evil on television, in the news, on the internet. It is gripping to some, mesmerizing to others. Society has become 

en-loped in the suffering of others and the chaos that surrounds it. It's incredibly challenging too when it seems to be that many find it so entertaining and often an obsession. God is not letting this happen. We all have free will, which means free thoughts and choice.

There is a light within us. All of us.

I wrote this for myself, to see if I can gain a better understanding of where the world is heading. I have so many beliefs. I have always wanted to understand more. I am just finding that there is so much insanity in the world stage, public rapes, public executions, school massacres on such a large stage.  It just feels like the world has been dropped in its head.

During all of this, I have my dream, my vision being challenged by its own drama. As this unfolds, perhaps this is the bigger lesson. Within all of this, it is to be strong, to be faithful to oneself, the truth. Love, above all, love.

Crazy girl I am.